Sherita Searcy Featured “Guest Life Coach” Center Stage w/ Nikki G
”The DISEASE To PLEASE: The Cause & The Cure” with Co-Host Vyta The Diva, and Special Guest, Life Coach Sherita Searcy. Monday, December 12th, at 7pm EST, “Center Stage with Nikki G.” WLUV Radio, click on blogtalkradio.com/wluvradio, or call in to 646-595-2083. Don’t Miss It!
How to Be A Boss
Everyone believes they have the perfect solution for you to move into the hub of your purpose. People can ONLY influence..YOU decide what your purpose is going to look like. Here are some quick tips to consider when moving toward the process of just being YOU!
1. Don’t let someone else tell you what your process should look like! Hear their opinion, line it up with (God’s)truth and YOU decide what works best for YOU!
2. Dig into yourself! Ask yourself everyday: What do I want from this season of my life? Then…day by day Ease Into that person! Writing it down is helpful.. but acting in it is even better!
3. Understand where you are going first! Develop a passion for it and then dig in!
4. Clean up your past and work on your future.
5. Connect with like-minds but don’t elevate them higher or lower than yourself!
6. Listen to the person within you who KEEPS popping up! She/He isn’t going anywhere! Become them!
Want to learn more? Visit www.beaboss.net!
Planning & Developing!
I’m working on www.beaboss.net! Get READY!
Commit To Yourself…
Last year this time my life was not in a great place. I knew 2010 would be challenging, but I didn’t expect what I got! Around 4 months ago…I told the Lord I was fed up with life and if he did not have a purpose for me to just allow me to die! I wanted to commit suicide, because I felt I had no reason to continue living! God asked…”Are you ready now?” I just said ..”Yes”
I made a choice to re-enter journalism part-time (putting my speaking career on hold)..and venture further into my skill in graphic design full-time! I just made a descision to be consistent no matter what happened! I set a schedule and maintained it …no matter how much I didn’t feel like doing it!
Fast forward to this week — I hit #1 Graphic Designer on Fiverr.com, secured several corporate contracts and created an inspirational T-shirt that is flying off the shelf! That is NOT the exciting part!
The gift came in the form of me loving and forgiving myself…. forgiving and releasing my father and mother from the life I “thought I should have had” but never recieved from them. I let it go! I am reconciling a broken and painful relationship with my ex-husband so we can be better parents to our children. Clarification: Reconcilation doesn’t nessasarily mean you re-enter an intimate relationship with that person…you just work things out peaceably as possible for the greater good of those involved.
God is good because he pursues us and brings us back to Him. I am rich in spirit and soon those riches will be manifested physically! I don’t know what you are going through, but trust your process! Continue to remember who you are and why you are here…in time you will be posting your story too!
“Be” The Boss” Pre-Order Your T-Shirt!
Put your name on the list to reserve your “Be The Boss” T-shirt!
“The Ultimate You” By Sherita Searcy
The New Year is coming and it is time to get your life back on track! Learn how to become, “The Ultimate You.”
Emotional Vunerability
For so many years I tried to hide my true self to others out of a desparate need of wanting to appear perfect. Yet it was my imperfections that shined brighter than anything. I wrote numerous journal entries to myself – reminding me of who I REALLY am and the person I AM supposed to be. I am emotionally vunerable right now. An inspirational/motivational woman who did not have the guts to believe in her own self. I don’t beat myself over the head for it, but I also realize it is a very big part of who I was and what I am NOW moving from. I am not where I used to be — but I am NOT where I want to be either. I have friends who are HIV positive and I hear about how they have to “disclose their status to their potential partners.” I feel the same about my future relationship. In my next relationship, I will tell HIM ….I suffer with Borderline Personality Disorder and Passive Aggressive Disorder, which at times will make me fear abandonment and push myself esteem into the ground. I will follow it with…. I can’t make any promises from day to day, but I am working on being a better me — so I can be a better friend/lover/companion for you and others.
We fear emotional vunerability because it puts in the heart of our weaknesses. When we flow past our fears something happens to the negativity engrained in our brilliant minds — it dissipates. It goes away! I don’t know what the future holds, but I am praying for greener grass. Day by day — this walk will get easier. My bags are packed and I’m headed to other side of the fence.
Riding The Wave
People tend to freak out when others talk about “energy” “aura” or “vibrations.” These words are not apart of our everyday vocabulary, yet they are the very make up of who we are. Understanding the essence of energy allowed me to understand how I was dealing in relationship with others in addition to the direction my life was headed in. Before I explain further, let me say this, “we attract who we are — where we are.” Though our hearts desire may be to attract all that appears good and right in our eyes — in reality we attract what we don’t want.
In the past, I created a list of things I wanted to avoid in an associate/business partner or mate — instead of jotting down what I admire in them. I also concentrated heavily on the list of things I did not want and I got it! Another big problem I encountered was trying to control how, when, where and why. The human in me wanted to track down a friend/business partner/mate who would not “hurt me.” This is a very laughable thought since the premise of love and every human experience is sacrifice, discipline, commitment, which every so often leads to pain. When you evaluate the premise of pain, you have to understand it is a growth mechanism. No matter how positive you try to make your world — you are going to encounter bouts of negativity. You can not have the yin without the yang. Yet, it is when you allow that pain to transform you from good to great — that makes all the difference.
Recently, I sat down and made a very short list of things I want to take action on. I realize focused energy is better than scattered energy. All things considered I had to ask myself the following questions:
- What do I want to accomplish?
- Who embraces my journey?
- Where do I want to end up?
The How does NOT matter — because the desire is there. Answering these questions helped me to gain clarity. Now I am positioning my actions to CREATE my reality. I don’t have to repeat the lessons of yesterday. I don’t have to keep asking for God (Spirit) to bring me to this reality — because I am already there. The ENERGY to create is surrounding every action I am taking in theses moments. Now it is time to manifest all that is possible. The minute I stop trying to CONTROL….and GO with the FLOW — things seem to just happen. Energy can be your friend if you understand how it works. I don’t need to be afraid to take action. If I allow this to halt my progress — I am essentially saying I am AFRAID to “go with the FLOW of what is natural.” ”I am afraid to be ME.” What is most interesting is the level of seed dropping that happens before you actually gain the strengths to take the next step.
This blog feels a bit scatterbrained, so…I might have to take a look at my thought process and revamp it.
To Be Continued……
Beyond Our Differences- The Documentary
“Beyond our differences, we are people of FAITH,” Beyond Our Differences
“We have the same goal and the same message to create a better human being,” The Dalai Lama.
At a time where we are all questioning who God is and what is his ultimate plan for humanity, in our search we always try to validate our thoughts and feelings. Raised a Christian, I always thought it was unfair that God would only limit his love, peace and grace to those who would accept him by being “saved.” As a little girl, I would always ask my mother….”so what would happen if someone is a foreign land never had a chance to hear about God — they would never have a chance to be saved.” Growing up, I thought about my position and I needed a more valid answer outside of what I was getting. Today, I found the answer to my question — God is bigger than my box.
God is love. God is patient. God is understanding. God is grace. God is accountability. God is hope. God is faith. God is respect. God is around us. God is IN us. God IS.
Watch this movie. Buy this movie. Share this movie with a friend. Clarity will surly come. www.beyondourdifferences.com
“Be Kind To Your Mind”
So often we try to cram our worlds into a can in hopes of producing a platter of delight — only to find that we continue to serve up a heap of tasteless crap. It does not sound appealing huh? Well, that is exactly what we do when we think we are able to take on monstrous task in one day.
Over the past couple of weeks, I have been making aggressive changes to my website. In times past, I would try to do it in one day and then end up disconnecting with its original intent. Then I took a chance to slow down this month to really understand the purpose behind what I was doing and it all clicked. I then realized it would be a work in progress and I would have to piece the puzzle together bit by bit. Not even realizing it — I was starting to “Be Kind To My Mind.” The mind is very sensitive and it begs to be coaxed into change.
Cool Quotes
“Ignorance is expensive.” by Sherita Searcy
“When you make up your mind…THE mind will create a truckload of reasons why you CAN’T before it will accept the fact that YOU WILL…” Sherita Searcy
“The true mark of a leader is one who is able to consistently follow without an alternate agenda. Be the leader you would follow. Follow the leader you would be.” Sherita Searcy
“God’s heart is manifested through relationships.” Sherita Searcy
“Love is about letting go.” Sherita Searcy
“Defeat the devil in YOUR mind FIRST…and you will realize the devil in others will cease to exist.” Sherita Searcy
I’m Breathing…
The road to purpose will never become clear until you make the connection. Andrea Brown-Clarke , CEO of What’s Your Inspiration always encourages her clients to Breathe. After taking note of that word it begin to translate into a true meaning for me.
When a child comes into the world it does not become a part of the human experience until it takes its first breath. Imagine the anticipation a parent must feel after birthing a child and going through insourmountable hours of labor only to hear the doctor say, “Miss your child is not breathing.” Getting a new born to take its first breath requires an extraction of mucus, water, blood, etc from its throat before the first breath can be taken. Once a clear path is established, the child’s lungs expands and the whining symphony ensues.
Birthing one’s purpose is no different. I came through an emergent (birthing) process, yet I was not breathing. I was trying to experience the birthing of my purpose with “mucus, water and blood” filling my lungs and I begin to suffocate. My lungs were filled with my isolated thoughts, feelings and emotions.
Excellence From The Bottom
We are growing through our age of anxiety. Lately I’ve heard looming reports of swine flu, Iraq deaths, lay offs and utter despair spawning from all corners of the earth. It is so difficult not to get caught up in the horror stories of a deafening recession, but it is here and very much a live in every facet of the current human existence. The word alone brings feelings of isolation, poverty, hopelessness and despair. Yet, in the midst of what should be a seemingly rough era, many people are taking opportunities to reclaim their life and start over from scratch and I am not immune.
With unexpected job cuts here, I too have been forced to re-evaluate my own life. In regrouping I found a treasure. I embraced an old tradition of putting first things first and taking stock in the smallest moments of life and making them phenomenal. We rarely evaluate the small things, because the bigger things in life seem to matter most when we are stressed and overwhelmed. Friends, it is not until we consciously make an effort to stop and look at the smaller picture and work our way from the bottom, that we can see and embrace the bigger giants ahead.
Excellence from the bottom can be achieved in the most simplistic manner imaginable. Perform a small task that will give you a sense of accomplishment, ex., washing the dishes, writing a short story, starting a blog, taking a bubble bath, walking the dog, etc. Start the task and keep at it until it is finished. Grab a journal and jot down the way you feel based on getting through your small challenge. Repeat the process with another task. These tasks may seem so minimal to the average person. Yet, when you accomplish one task after another, you will begin to feel like you have conquered something phenomenal by doing a collection of small things. Once you have achieved this feat, you will begin to see larger tasks in a more condensed framework.
We do not have to be overwhelmed by the blow of this recession if we understand how to navigate our happiness. Starting and completing small task is one of many things you can do to fuel your emotional gas tank. You may also want to try reaching out to people you are not familiar with, also giving and serving other people in a way that is life transformative, will also do the trick. Most importantly, take one step at a time, pace yourself and brace yourself for the best! You can be excellent from the bottom – start today!
Framework
Excuse the website jumble …
We are building its framework. In the meantime, enjoy previous blog articles written by Sherita Searcy!
Not About Me!
Photo courtesy of Noweia.co.uk
My journey is not about me. I have experienced it. I have lived it. I have endured it. All of these statements hold truth to them, yet today I came to the reality that my life is greater than me. I am one of millions of people on this earth who have endured countless trials. The truth is we all suffer. Yet, our depth of suffering must never be used to highlight our vainglory. Instead, it must shared and imparted to those who NEED to believe in something greater than their circumstances.
Everyday, God is creatively finding ways to show is greatness among mankind. We are a simpleminded people and at times we don’t get the hint the first time around. We get inspired. A voice within tells us to write the book – do the seminar – talk to the CEO at that major company. Something within us freezes. We hold back out of fear — mentally asking ourselves sabotagging questions: Am I good enough? Am I prepared enough? Am I qualified enough? Do I have what it takes to make it? When you take the spotlight off of you — a human being that is simply created to be imperfect — “out of no where” God throws His hands in the mix and things turn out much better than anticipated and you are past where you need to be.
Get past yourself! Know that whatever you are doing in this moment is meant to happen and there are people nationwide who are going to be impacted by the choices you make today. Decide to become a person who is focused on using your life to show how extraordinary the God of the Universe can be. Don’t get stuck in technicalities and analysis paralysis. Say to yourself today — it’s not about me! Yet, it is all about me….Because You Can (Do all things with God)!
Love and Leadership
Photo Courtesy of Aaronarkkelin.blogspot.com
Over the past couple of days, I have been wresting with my worth. I wondered how I could keep personal boundaries in place to love someone wholeheartedly from the level I used to be at, yet reject love from other who are on a level I want to attain. I cried profusely asking God to give me understanding of the reason I felt so stuck. It was in the midst of my tears that I realized I got a promotion.
When we look at the organization of life and we understand there are people who do and people who do, then one can fathom the invisible hierarchical chain of command and place of position of its people. When you choose to remain in a level of complacency, you are choosing within the organization of life to be just an employee. Not a supervisor! Not a manager! Not the CEO — just a punch in – punch out employee. A person paid just enough to make it. Yet, when one positions themselves for greater than their current best they push for something more than what they are getting. Mediocre is not good enough! One paycheck to the next is not good enough! Long nights at the office become timeless. Your focus and concentration is in getting to the next level and moving beyond sweeping the floors and filling up French fry vats.
Positioning yourself to achieve rank in the organization of life means consciously moving past the employee mentality and pushing toward the challenge of leading others toward the greatness you have already conquered. In the same rite, practicing and conquering tools to move you to upper level management and a higher level of responsibility. If you find yourself saying, “I’m not where I used to be and I have no desire to go back to that place. Yet, I’m not where I want to be and I know there is more I have to do.” I now bid you a hearty congratulation – you too have been promoted!
While position and worth is key, my tears led me to a greater understanding of love in leadership. When we pour love into the lives of people who are where we used to be — by leading them to where we are – love through appreciation is given. We, who have endured levels of personal challenge through change, in turn gain a higher value of self love and love for those who have paved the way for our success. No matter the course, you have a choice.
I encourage you to choose to be more than what you are today. The world needs more people who will decide to be the CEO’s of their life. Start today, by becoming the leader you would follow. Try:
• Surrounding yourself with people who challenge your character.
• Evaluate where you are and where you want to be.
• Look into your life and find ways to teach what you have learned and/or experienced.
• Do more of the things you loathe, so you can find the beauty in them.
Don’t let your life wither without a trace. Get promoted today…Because You Can!
Develop Persistent Patience…Because You Can!
We hate to wait for the unexpected, because we are do busy worrying about what to expect.
Photo Courtesy of Farm 1
It’s duck mating season and for the past week, I have been watching habits of these beautiful animals and it reminded me of persistent patience. Every night I walk into work, I can expect to see a mother duck quietly sitting still on a nest full of eggs — keeping a watchful eye on predators that would dare interrupt the birthing process of her young. Day and night, these ducks are wholeheartedly centered on one purpose – to bring more “duck” life into the world. Amazing!
Persistent patience is simply the act of putting first things first and actively working toward our visions through being aggressively persistent yet patient enough to see the process through to its natural end. If we took the attitude of the mother duck, and patiently waited and worked to “warm our nest eggs,” I wonder what powerful things we could accomplish. To often we get caught in our personal worlds of selfishness in working, paying bills, taking care of the kids, socializing, etc., that we rarely take time to remember that the very best things in life are worth waiting for.
We grow impatiently daily because:
- 1. Our environment, mentality and habits dictates our daily behavior.
- 2. We can not predict what will happen if we are not aggressively working on a quick solution to end our trial.
Yet in persistent patience we are able to accomplish:
- 1. Improved communication with others.
- 2. Better planning and organization.
- 3. An opportunity to venture into self discovery and personal development.
- 4. An ability to empower others and empower ourselves.
The mother duck waits patiently day in and day out for her ducklings to come into the world. In patience, she knows the agony of waiting in the unexpected is insignificant compared to the joy she will experience of seeing the fruit of her work.
Be like the mother duck … Develop Persistent Patience…Because You Can!
Lose Control…Because You Can!
We are afraid to die, because we are afraid to loose control.
Photo Courtesy of Kevinmartineau.blogspot.com
Today, I was talking to a co-worker who recounted memories of working as a volunteer in the Intensive Care Unit at Cleveland Clinic. She detailed fond times she had with patients as they weathered through debilitating diseases and other death threatening illnesses. “The hardest part was watching them take their last breath,” she said. Why? I asked. She continued, “they were mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically tired, but they didn’t want to die because they were to busy trying to fight for something they had no control over – the care and security of their loved ones.”
To often the urge to maintain control compresses our ability to experience true freedom. Everyday, we are given an opportunity to surrender ourselves to faith and believe in something we don’t have the ability to control. Many times we will venture into our comfort zone and block out the opportunity to loose control because there is no way for us to predict what is going to happen next. There are several key factors that contribute to the reasons why we won’t release ourselves to faith in the unknown.
- We believe God is not big enough to handle the finite details of our life.
- We believe maintaining a sense of control will provide a level of protection and safety.
- We resist change at all cost, because it disrupts our world and the way we view life.
- Losing control may reveal our true identity.
We were created as creatures of free will, so we have the ability to choose if we will surrender and let go, or remain stuck in a boxed comfort zone. We like our comfort, and often many will opt to try and control the world around them and everyone attached to that world – instead of letting go. Holding on means:
- Staying where you are and repeatedly doing things you can’t stand to make yourself feel “comfortable.”
- Settling for less than you deserve.
- Sitting back and watching other people enjoy what you dream about.
- Putting yourself through insane amounts of stress through crying and worrying, due to the inability to predict an outcome for your circumstances.
We are not physically dead, but everyday we become just like the ICU patient at Cleveland Clinic who knows at one point they will have to surrender to something greater than themselves. Let go! Practice the art of releasing. Sing: Hakuna Matata (No Worries For The Rest Of Your Days). No matter what you do – surrender your thoughts, actions and will to faith.
Choose to lose control so you can experience the freedom of life…Because You Can!
Listen to Hakuna Matata!
Practice Perfection…Because You Can
Quote courtesy of Thinkexsist.com
Photo courtesy of www.holyswitch.nl
I was afraid to swim, because I was afraid to drown.
Before starting my normal routine this morning, I decided to go swimming at the YMCA. I figured since I am in the rebirth stage of my life — I would be able to claim sure victory over my greatest fear. I jumped in the water and immediately begin to panic. Frustrated, I waded in the water for two minutes before a fellow lap swimmer came by and said, “Take your time and breathe.” She further suggested I swim the short length of the pool before trying to conquer the deep end. “If you jump off in the deep end you are going to have to do something!” she said. Whoa! The statement hit me like a ton of bricks. After a few unsuccessful turned successful attempts at swimming laps in the shorter width of the pool, the life guard came by and suggested I sign up for beginner swimming lessons. “You won’t fear the water if you know how to navigate the waves,” she said.
We only fear what we have not perfected. Perfection in this sense is doing something repeatedly until it becomes a part of who you are. There are three core reasons why we fail at achieving personal perfection:
- We are afraid of what we will discover about our own human potential.
- We become frustrated in the practice process and give up before perfection is achieved.
- We believe false thoughts of inadequacy and incapability.
Practicing perfection means you have to:
- Sacrifice your comfort zone.
- Do something you likely won’t enjoy over and over and over again.
- Fighting thoughts that would make you believe you don’t have what it takes to achieve personal perfection.
- Wholeheartedly believe in your human and personal potential.
- Combat periods of frustration with insurmountable faith in your personal ability.
I start swimming lessons next week. I am not scared of drowning – my greater challenge is in the journey I will experience in seeing myself overcome a fear that has for too long held me in captivity.
Today, dare to practice perfection…Because You Can!
Time to Live
Photo Courtesy of Hickerphoto.com
Today is my rebirthday!
To know life one must die first.
In the course of my cocoon experience I learned many lessons.
- 1. Fear and Faith are the driving forces of life.
- 2. Hate is only limited to the perceptions you have of your own ability.
- 3. There are people who do and don’t. Everyday you have a choice to go either way.
- 4. People need what you have to offer if you are willing to offer it.
- 5. Not everyone will get you and that is okay.
- 6. Live life to the fullest because you can.
- 7. Everyone has a bad day, month and year — no one has a bad life even if it seems to be that way.
- 8. Life is a roller coaster you must ride. You can decide to go with your eyes open or shut — no matter what you are going.
- 9. Positive energy goes a long way. Having a spiritual foundation gets you even further.
- 10. Everything boils down to oneness and God, so we might as well accept it.
The most difficult feat I encountered in my rebirth experience is getting to the bottom of my no. I accepted the fact that if no one in the entire universe wanted to hear what I had to say — that I would still say it with the same vigor and tenacity as having 100,000 people logged in and subscribing to my blog. Our greatest fear lies in our greatest lack of faith. We are scared of what we can’t see — so we create walls around our life to protect us from the things we think we can control. None of us are in control — so in essence we are driving ourselves insane. Our life is already written and everything that did, was and will happen was solidified before any of us came into this crazy world.
Find freedom in just letting go. Dare yourself to be the person you want to be. Try yourself on for size and you may even find that you fit into the person you want to so wholeheartedly be. The bottom line is we are here and we can choose to be negative or positive. There is no wrong and right answer to life …it just is. We can lead or follow. We can lift or lean. We can do or don’t. Life will still go on with or with you participating.
Now my time is centered in getting in where I fit in and flowing wholeheartedly in that vein. I have added new elements to sheritasearcy.com:
1. The Resource Room – This page will provide educational and tool-based resources you can use to advance your knowledge and other services that will enhance your causes.
2. The Lean Movement – This page will provide a list of inspirational/motivational music to link to when the mood hits.
3. Change Now – This page is an educational resource in Life Coaching and learning how to move past yourself to be who you are called to be.
4….Because I can. This is a fun and easy way to learn what you are capable of doing instead of focusing on negativity. Instructions: Type in what you are doing right now, have done in the past or will do in the future and add …Because I Can… at the end.
Fun times. Let’s grow.
Social Disconnect
Photo courtesy of Cmea.com
I’m gelling. Little by little my emergence is becoming more apparent. Behind the walls of my life lies a little girl that wants to be heard. Yet, there also stands an experienced woman armed with love ready to spread a message that is promised to change lives across the globe. In the mist of this re-emergent process, I realize my life has nothing to do with me. My trials are not my own. They are to be shared for the co-operative healing that will take place in the lives of millions as a result of my fighting effort to emerge, share and be used as a light.
We fight daily to survive life, yet we never live until our life impacts and heals someone else. We are made to be transparently interdependent — depending on our Creator for guidance while utilizing human resources to navigate through this emotional roller coaster we call life. We are called to educate. We are called to give. We are called to share. Yet, in the midst of this dynamic lies an even greater disparity — social exclusion and social isolation. We are in essence dying on the vine of life by shielding our true selves and allowing the person we are meant to be remain locked in a cell of delusional pain. Pain is not designed to harbor, but be expressed for individual and collective growth. If I were the only person in the world who experienced a death, while the rest of the world only experiences moments of life and happiness — I would in essence die. On the undercurrent, we are all one — experiencing similar things at random moments in time — and on different levels. Here’s the breakdown — we harbor the desire to be transparent, turn into our circumstances and internally/emotionally and mentally die. In essence, no growth is achieved for me or you. Therefore, we are left believing that our trials are unique and we fall into a demented mindset that cultivates thoughts that says, “Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen.” (more…)
The Emergence
The Re-Birthing of Sherita Searcy is Coming… April 15, 2009
The Emergence
I have been in a “cocoon” like state since September 2008. I stopped writing. I stopped reaching out. I stopped connecting. I stopped advising. I just stopped! Every so often, I felt like I needed to re-connect, reach out and write an occasional Blog or note to let everyone know I was doing okay, but I still was not ready to be revealed.
In this period of death, I did not realize I would be going through a spiritual, relational, mental and physical transformation process that would change the very essence of my being. I found the leader in me. I found the woman in me. I found the mother in me. I found the friend in me. I found the spirit in me. I found Sherita Searcy.
In the cocoon, I learned many things and soon they will be shared with you. I am excited about the journey we will embark on together. This re-emergence is not just about me, I know your life will be affected as well. Thank you for the times we shared. I look forward to the new future we will create together. It’s our time.
Truly,
Sherita Searcy
Love — No Limit
Try to love with no limit — it is life changing and possible.
I am at rest and I no longer struggle with the concept of love, yet its intricate nature continues to boggle me. We love our friends. We love our family. We love our children. We love our soul mates. We love our co-workers and bosses (well sometimes). We love to do things we have a passion for. With love surrounding us at every turn, why do we put a limit on something that is indefinately limitless.
Recently, I had a friend whom I loved very dearly. Both professional and personal interactions were at its best with this person and I believed the connection would last a lifetime. After a small disagreement, the bond of love and friendship I believed would last a lifetime ended in a simple whimper. In that moment, I realized that pain was love and love was pain. To truly experience love with no limit, we have to open ourselves to vunerablities that would make us face reality and embrace the truth. The truth is — someone we love will leave us, whether in natural separation or death. In that mindset, when we gravitate to the concept that true love is endless and it is manifested everytime you smile, say thank you, hold your lover’s hand, send flowers to a grieving friend, etc …we are giving love with no limit. We are realizing that love will be defined not by what someone did for us, but in the moments we shared and the lessons we learned.
Life is unfolding in front of our eyes. Grab onto the gift that is given to you everyday — yourself and the person in your life who loves you with no limit. Now in that thought …even God is smiling.
Soul Mates: The Path to Becoming and Being
Today, I have come to a new revelation on what a soul mate is and how you will be able to recognize them. You might want to take notes.
I. Individuality
People who have come into a place of wholeness within themselves create a personal code of ethics, values and beliefs — this is the system they live by. These principles define who he/she based on their personal experiences, point of view and continuous education (spiritual development, personal development).
Usually this person takes full responsibility for his/her life and does not look to others to create a sense of personal wholeness. This person independently relies on their value system to assess and make various decisions about the direction and changes needed to be made in their life to grow. Yet they are interdependent networkers (always realizing that she/he must reach out to make sure their personal value system is “up to code.”)
II. Soul Mate:
Humans are created to have free will, therefore, a person “becoming” may encounter several soul mates before an equal connection is made. In the selection process, a man can choose the woman. The woman can choose the man, or it can be a mutual agreement between both parties based on each individual’s willingness to accept the following:
1. The long term vision of the soul mates.
2. The holistic view of weakness and the potential to harness those weaknesses.
3. The holistic view of strengths and the potential to maximize those strengths.
4. The balance of the strengths and weaknesses between each individual.
5. The willingness to fuse value systems, harness strengths, maximize weakeness and weather adversity admist the journey of becoming. (Strength/Weakness balance: For richer or poorer, through sickness and in health.)
In the course of free will, soul mates may connect at various stages of life. If either person has not arrived at a place where at least one of the soul mates are not willing to accept the long term vision and challenge of “growth and becoming together,” someone will leave (the choice is not bias to man/female). The decision of either soul mate to leave is not a personal reflection of the individual “becoming” because humans still are beings of free will and another persons choice would never affect your personal value system (you are still an individual independent of your soul mate.) If one individual has not created a value system or is dependent on the soul mate with a value system — that person without a value system may feel like their chances of having a soul mate again will never come, or that they won’t be/are not worthy enough to have such great “deep love” encounter.
III. Is he/she my soul mate? How will I know?
Soul mates will continue to come into an individuals life until a soul connection is made (a decision to marry). Soul mates are very recognizable and unforgettable. There is something within your soul that bears witness to the magnitude this person has or will have in your life. You should feel very close and comfortable with your soul mate. You may experience having feelings unlike you have ever known and connect with that person on deep level. It also does not matter how long or how short of a time period you have known this person. The impact will still be just as great no matter the course. If the soul mate does not stay for one reason or another, they will leave the other soul mate with a load of lessons to be learned before having to encounter the next soul mate. If the lessons are not learned once the other soul mate enters the picture, the lesson will be much more apparent and “painful” as these lessons are meant to encourage personal, spiritual growth and change. Most people will rebel and stray away from learning the lesson and decide to “take easy classes” to avoid the pain of enduring the “harder test.”
Conclusion
Your soul mate(s) come to prepare, carry and weather the storm of your “becoming and being: you.” You must also remember that you play the equal role in their lives. Before trying to search out a soul mate, make sure your “I am ready for a soul mate” check list is covered.
- 1. I have a set of principles and a value system that I live by.
- 2. I accept personal responsibility for my own actions, life, goals and aspiration (self-motivated.)
- 3. I am on an individual journey of becoming or being — independent of my soul mate.
- 4. I am willing to endure the lessons my soul mate is going to teach me.
- 5. I am willing to grow with my soul mate admist his/her strengths, weaknesses, personal value system admist my personal journey of becoming.
- 6. I have assessed and learned from past lessons of my previous soul mates and I am ready and open to accepting more lessons through a mutual soul connection. (Bonus).
